It's Time to Ban Pants
Sat, May 31st 2008, 13:39
Like most red-blooded Americans, I want to do everything I can to help my country fight the War on Terror. And, like many others, sometimes I get confused and lack the initiative or knowledge to know what to do next. Luckily, Michelle Malkin has come into my life. Michelle is brilliant. If you aren't aware of her latest slap in the face to Osama bin Laden, it came in the form of a proposed boycott of Dunkin' Donuts because in one of their television commercials, Rachael Ray is wearing what appears to be a "black-and-white keffiyeh".
What is a keffiyeh you might ask? For the uneducated, a keffiyeh is a traditional headdress worn by Arab men. However, Michelle knows there is more to it; she claims the keffiyeh "is the traditional scarf of Arab men that has come to symbolize murderous Palestinian jihad." And while Rachael Ray was, according to the Dunkin' Donuts statement, "wearing a black-and-white silk scarf with a paisley design that was purchased at a U.S. retail store," Michelle had the insight to see what was
really going on here and threatened a boycott if the ad was not pulled. Luckily cooler heads prevailed and the ad was immediately pulled off the air. In your face bin Laden!
To get the other side to this, I contacted the Boston chapter of the Muslim American Society. I politely put forth my question as to why they hate America, and why wearing a keffiyeh is even allowed any more. A lovely young lady named Elizabeth "Lizzy" Dann responded with some information. She claims that the keffiyeh has become a fashion trend and that it doesn't mean anything close to what Michelle says it does. In fact, she goes on to say "Also, just as a side note, it has no religious significance whatsoever. It doesn't stand for anything at all...it has taken on meaning insofar as it is connected to a culture and a "race" of people...but in itself it is just as meaningless as a shoe, or a shirt. It was not created for any political or religious purpose, and has been worn for centuries...long before we even knew what a 'jihadist' was." Now, I know what you're thinking to yourself: "who knows more about Muslim culture? The Outreach Center Coordinator for the Boston chapter of the Muslim American Society or Michelle Malkin?" The answer is painfully obvious.
I applaud Malkin's no nonsense approach to this issue. It takes guts to go against to the liberal media and take a stand on a complete non-issue with erroneous information backed by empty threats. Who cares if Rachael Ray was actually wearing an American scarf? Michelle Malkin doesn't fuck around when it comes to terrorism. Which brings me to the real issue here: khaki pants.
Inspired by the Michelle, I did some research of my own. What I found out was as alarming. Millions of people have been wearing khaki pants with no idea of the ideologies I've decided they are supporting. To quote Wikipedia, "The name comes from the Persian word khak (dust/ashes) which came to English from India, specifically via the British Indian Army." And do you know who was in the British Indian Army? Muslims. The history gets really confusing, but all you have to know is that in the end, the British no longer govern India. What is it about Muslims that they can't accept a helping hand? After minutes of research, I had seen enough. I, David Chez, from this day forth will no longer wear khaki pants, and I urge anybody who loves American to do the same.
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